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Anyone who cares to make a donation to the American Red Cross, either to the national disaster relief fund or the California Wildfires fund, feel free to follow this link. I'll probably end up donating blood as well as trying to find some other volunteer activities in the local area if i can. |
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I got an invitation to attend a function organized by <lj user="ayacchi"> the other night, a memorial service for a well known and highly repsected orthopedic surgeon in the east bay area, and a doctor that she worked closely with who passed away in a very untimely manner. Altho i knew about his passing months ago, i always had the mental picture that he was much older, in the golden years of his life, but the biggest shock to me was seeing his pictures and realizing how young he was. On top of that he was leaving behind a young wife and 2 children, one who was just out of college and the other who hadnt yet graduated. I couldnt imagine a worse time for a father to leave his family like that.
It was a beautiful memorial service with several respected colleagues who came up and spoke about him and the orthopedics medical field in general. While i was sitting there listening to the various speakers, what kept going thru my mind was a sense of my own impending mortality. I don't really fear or worry much about my own death since my profession has made me somewhat densensitized, but i couldnt help think about what kind of legacy i would leave behind, what kind of impact my life and presence would have on the world, and the people around me, and maybe ppl i have never and may never meet. Basically, who would show up at my memorial service and what would they possibly have to say about me.
In a way, i dont really care what other ppl have to say, including friends or loved ones. Mainly because i already know how those close to me think and feel, and if they want to tell everyone else thats great, but they certainly don't have to do it for my sake. As far as friends go, i guess its the same, because either they have good things to say out of love, friendship or respect, or they dont have anything good to say at all. For the former, its just affirmation which i dont really need to confirm, and for the latter, well if they truly didn't like me, i don't think my departed soul is going to stick around earth just to hear that. Still i am curious how much of an impact i will have made on the lives of the people i live, work, and play with every day, or ones i haven't done so in years. It's almost like finding out my ultimate score in the 'six degrees of separation' game.
While i may not care much about my mark on the world, i have been changing my view on life and death. Most of my life, i've always felt i've lived a solitary life, and that my choices, feelings and actions had minimal impact and effect on others. Basically if i went to the grave, the world would keep on moving without a blink. I've slowly began to change the way i think about that and now i am starting to treat myself with more care and responsibility, being more mindful of the future. I guess i've come to realize that my life isnt entirely my own any more and as long as there are ppl who are a part of it, they are part investors/owners as well. To draw a business analogy, i hope i'm still a majority shareholder, but in the future that may not even be true anymore :p
I don't really know where i'm going with all of this so i think i'll stop here. |
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Some of you already know this, and those who don't, when i logged onto the ABA (american board of anesthesia) website a couple weeks ago, this is what i saw:
A weight that had been haunting me every since i started studying almost 2 years ago has been lifted off my proverbial shoulders in a big way.
Now that i passed that, i now qualify to take the SECOND PORTION of the board examinations which is oral, harder and more stressful than the first part. Tell me what you think is worse, a 500 question 6 hr written exam where you are thinking feverishly and trying to answer questions at a pace less than 1 question/minute....or taking a freeform 30 min oral exam in front of a board of inquisitors where they can ask you about anything, there are necessarily no right answers, but if i choke and get stage fright, i have zero time to recover and pass the rest of the exam. Plus if i don't pass, i might have to take BOTH the written and orals again next year.
Oh yeah and my reg free for the oral exam cost me over $1700 to apply. I hope i can write this off on this years taxes.
So now i'm back in full study mode, i honestly want to take this only once and never again. Sometimes i think i prefer my life this way, sitting at home hanging and doing nothing but playing online and watching tv was starting to unsettle me. |
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Sep. 20th, 2006 @ 01:01 pm
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I told someone the other day despite my *apparent* semblance of intelligence and wit, that at times i am still a complete moron. I had trouble providing an example at the time, but here it is:
I opened up a Bank of American acct back in PA and transferred all my remaining cash funds to it before my move to CA, however upon arriving here i found that i needed to open a new account in CA if i wanted immediate account transactions at the bank (silly me i thought it was a national bank) so i opened a new california account and moved funds over. What i forgot was that i ordered checks thru my old account number and due to some screw up in the mail, i promptly forgot about it and ordered a new set of checkbooks for the cali account. This resulted in me getting 2 sets of checkbooks with two DIFFERENT account numbers at around the same time. Of course i opened one of them, didn't really pay attention to the check number, sat down and started writing a few checks out for substantial sums of money.
Take a wild guess which set of checkbooks i opened up?
Of course i didnt realize what i did until i started getting returned check notices like 'insufficient funds for a $5 check'.
Now i'm looking at over $100 in combined return check fees, and once i figured out what i did, i trashed the set of checks with the wrong number. Oh i piss myself off sometimes. *stab myself in the head* |
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This sunday, 9/24/06 2pm, free performance of the Tempest in the Presidio, i'm going, so should you and if you don't you're a puppy-kicking terrorist who doesnt care about black people.
http://www.sfstation.com/free-shakespeare-in-the-park-e24854
I'd suggest going early tho since the buzzword is FREE. |
| » I bring to you the most annoying, virally catching tune ever. |
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Anyone remember the 'paris hiton poses exactly the same in every picture' ytmnd?
Ok here you go: http://parisfacial.ytmnd.com/
Since i saw that 2 days ago, that song has been trapped in my head, i showed it to a couple coworkers and they started humming it within minutes and threatened to kill me for putting the tune in their heads.
Sep. 18th, 2006 @ 01:49 pm
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| » It's like having a plant and a pet at the same time... |
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Went into a bonsai store today and ended up walking out with this:
I shall name it 'pinchy', now where are those damn flies when i need them...
Sep. 17th, 2006 @ 09:00 pm
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| » Teacher won't shave beard until Bin Laden caught |
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'EPHRATA, Washington (AP) -- After the September 11 terrorist attacks, Gary Weddle followed the news so closely he forgot to shave. After a week he decided not to shave until Osama bin Laden was caught or killed.
Nor has Weddle, 46, who expected the al Qaeda leader to be caught within a month or so, trimmed his facial hair in the succeeding five years as he went from substitute teacher to science instructor at Ephrata Middle School.
At the start of each school year he gives students a brief explanation of his beard, which stretches more than a foot and has started turning gray.
"I still get emotional over the families who lost loved ones. I just don't feel there's any closure on this until they get that guy," Weddle told The Wenatchee World for an article published Monday. "I don't have to know anyone personally who lost family in 9/11 to understand the devastation that he's responsible for."
His wife, Donita, hates the beard, but their three daughters, who attend high school in East Wenatchee, don't mind and "mostly their boyfriends think it's cool," Weddle said.
He said he would keep the beard, untrimmed, as long as bin Laden remains at large -- "even if I get buried with it." '
I'm sorry but this guy's silent statement of protest just seems stupid, and the only reason the press decided to print this story is because he's starting to ironically look like Bin Laden himself.
Sep. 15th, 2006 @ 06:48 am
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| » Wie oft ging welches handy kaput? |
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Ok so i dont really know german but this is an excerpt scanned from one of the largest european print magazines on mobiles/cells/keitai, the German Connect. Its a ratings chart on rates of phone unreliablity and failure. Interesting how Nokia's seem to dominate that upper half of the failure rate chart:
Sep. 15th, 2006 @ 06:33 am
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| » Densha Otoko |
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ok, so someone close to me has recommended that i check out this j drama series and so far i'm hooked after the first ep.
This series was based on the novel that was based on real series of events based on the infamous 2chan BBS in japan. Prior to this all i knew about 2chan was a whole series of really weird flash animations involving scary ascii cats...
The parts involving all the yahoos on the chat forums are funny, yet disturbingly hit too close to home. Plus the main character has way too many gundam models on his shelves...and worse i can name them all :/
Plus i keep checking out his Sanyo keitai for some reason...
Another nod to the hat to us old skool anime nerds is the resurrection of the old Daicon 4 opening animation, one of Gainax's earliest projects, and the ELO song Twilight which i haven't heard in ages:
Daicon 4 opening animation
Densha Otoko opening sequence
Sep. 14th, 2006 @ 07:04 pm
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| » Ouch my neck... |
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I've been having more back pain and muscle strain lately and looking into ways to keep it from getting much worse. I even tried one of those $12 for 15 min chinese accupressure massage deals in the mall courtyard, i thought what the hell, something is better than nothing. Boy did that session hurt, plus i forgot how *ticklish* i was everywhere, and in places i didn't really expect (i'm not going to reveal that sensitive info lest it be used against me). At one point the guy who was giving me the back beating grabbed me by the neck and told me to hang on and yanked me out of my seat by my *neck*. For a sec i thought my head was going to pop off when i literally heard a little *pop* and i promptly checked my arms and legs to see if i could still move them. Driving home is no fun whn you're paralyzed.
I was reminded of this when i had to help get an emergency case started tonight. A guy in his mid 50s came to our hospital a quaddraplegic, the scary thing was a week ago he was just fine, and then he made a trip to a chiropractor to get some neck/spine manipulation done. A few days later he started developing right sided weakness and was admitted to another hospital where they figured out he had an expanding hematoma in his neck, compressing on the spinal cord in his neck. When i saw him he couldnt move his arms or legs. We'll see how he recovers, all i know is it wont be fast...
I don't know where that chiropractor is, but i think i'll just stay the hell away from all of them.
Sep. 13th, 2006 @ 10:51 pm
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| » Coming this summer....the man...with the voice! |
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Remember Don LaFontaine from the Geico ad, aka 'the guy who voices all the movie trailers'?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJMGS7l0wT8
I found this clip from a Good Morning America interview and it had me rolling:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wkhdy6bavuk&NR
I can't imagine him narrating all the things in my life:
'One man....on a trip to the bathroom....will it be his last?'
Sep. 10th, 2006 @ 07:42 pm
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| » phone freaks |
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Most ppl who know me know how i'm obsessed with cell phone tech, (or mobiles as they're called across the pond in europe.
Came across this interesting article on how the cell phone culture in europe contrasts greatly to the US. Here we view it as a tool that is necessary but not necessarily loved, while overseas, it's viewed as a whole lifestyle accessory, and a bionic extension of the person.
http://mobileopportunity.blogspot.com/2006/09/european-vs-american-mobile-phone-use.html
btw here's my new toy, the Samsung SGH-D900:
the 3MP is by far the best samsung has put out on a phone, better than my P850 which also had autofocus but was really annoying to use:
a couple sample photos:
Sep. 9th, 2006 @ 09:25 am
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| » chicken feet! |
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So i'm on pager call this sat and trauma call sunday, why of all weekends do i have to get 3 different invites for dim sum at the same time.
I want some shu mai dammit.
Sep. 8th, 2006 @ 09:05 pm
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| » Hmm this could explain a LOT |
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Friend of mine sent me this link, funny as hell: it explains the recent craze for korean men by women all over asia, particularly in japan:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/08/30/AR2006083002985.html
To all my korean dongsengs and hyungnims, theres still hope for you guys!
Sep. 4th, 2006 @ 12:08 pm
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| » (No Subject) |
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Jet Blue Oakland to Long Beach = best flight EVAR
i love long beach airport, i never imagined it would be possible to fly into LA hassle free and without crowds. may LAX go up in a toothpaste/shampoo bomb explosion.
attn FAA: on the record i didn't mean that (yes i did)
Sep. 3rd, 2006 @ 08:49 pm
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| » Labor Dabor |
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Went down to LA again for the weekend, enjoying what was probably my first labor day weekend in nearly 4 years (i was always stratgeically put on call a sat, sun, mon effectively destroying a 3 day weekend.
I also went to disneyland for the first time ever, which is pretty normal considering i grew up in the midwest and spent most of my childhood going to disneyworld instead. After seeing the anaheim park, i realized that trying to compare the land and world was pretty much an apples n oranges thing, since one is an amusement park, and the other is closer to a small nation (bigger than the smallest countries in europe i think).
All in all the park layout was just like the Magic Kingdom in disneyworld so once i started wandering around, everything was very familiar. Still, since i hadn't been to disneyworld in nearly 10 years, i had a lot of fun going on old rides like pirates and the haunted mansion again.
A lot of ppl including myself thought i was stupid/insane for wanting to go there on the sat of labor day weekend, but because of one thing or another, didn't end up actually arriving til nightfall and stayed til closing, which worked out perfectly. There was no line at the ticket office and wait times in line lasted 20-30 min tops. Managed to hit most parts of the park including an after midnight ride of Space Mtn, omg i forgot how much fun that was. Maybe its because im older/bigger/heavier, those tight cornering Gs get to me a lot more than in the past.
Will definitely have to plan for a magic mtn trip in the fall.
Sep. 3rd, 2006 @ 12:48 pm
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| » What the hell season is it anyway? |
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So i'm hanging out at a barnes n noble and i start to realize i'm living in a 2 season state (Warm and Warmer). The starbucks cafe is already bringing back their autumn seasonal drinks, the pumpkin spice latte and caramel apple cider and i look out the window then look back at the drink menu confused for a sec and realize its already september. Yes many ppl consider sept the tail end of summer, but FF to oct, a classic fall month and i know the weather outside will be exactly the same. I used to love drinking the hot spice cider on a cold fall day but somehow this weather just doesn't put me in the mood.
I wonder how long it will take me to miss the change of seasons, it was probably one of the few truly beautiful things about the sorry-ass east coast.
Sep. 1st, 2006 @ 07:13 pm
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| » Speaking of childhood |
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I come across a photo of the funniest exit sign in the detroit area on the internet. I've driven by this quite a few times with my family as a kid:
If you want to see the actual location, just do a google map search on '301 w big beaver rd, troy, MI'
Sep. 1st, 2006 @ 06:30 am
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| » Things you did as a kid that you *still* do? |
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This question was inspired by the a thread from another board. Name me something weird/gross/silly habit/tick or tendency you had as a little kid that persisted until today.
and for the record let's not include 'watch cartoons/play with toys' cause too many 'grownup' ppl do that too.
However something like 'wetting the bed' or 'counting with your fingers and toes' does count ;)
I guess i'll start off with the first thing that comes to mind:
I still pick my nose frequently and when im indoors and can't find a discreet place to dispose of it, i wipe it under a desk/chair/green colored wall.
Sep. 1st, 2006 @ 06:17 am
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